Keeping it Real for New Year's

New Year's.  A time to reflect upon the good and bad moments from the previous year and set new goals for the upcoming year. 

Now it's time for what I like to call "Keeping it Real."  What good things happened in 2013 and what things happened that still to this day irritate you so much that your negative feelings will probably continue irritating you long after 2013 closes?  What are your resolutions that sound good on paper, but realistically won't be followed too long after the month of January?  You know it's true.  I know it's true.  Even fancy retailers know it's true which is why they only discount exercise equipment and diet foods for the month of January.  Just saying.

Totally awesome things that happened in 2013 (and that even rhymes):

• Joe and I got married and it was exactly what I pictured and wanted.  I purposely did everything myself so if something screwed up I could only blame myself and I wouldn't have to physically harm another human.
• I was pleased that my bridezilla moments were few and far between.  I imagined myself  to be quite worse and the only people that truly witnessed how bad I could possibly be were Joe, my mom, my Thailand florist, and the catering manager...whoops!
• The cabana that we rented in Vegas was pretty darn sweet and I felt rich and important.
• I am finally pleased with the decorations of my house.  It took several trials, some gift cards, and returning a few wedding gifts to make it look totally awesome.
• Joe ended 2013 with an awesome career boost that will hopefully turn me into a "Real Housewife" sooner rather than later.

Things that happened in 2013 that I will continue to be irritated about for an undisclosed amount of time and/or for the rest of my life:

• The people that didn't come to my bridal shower or wedding reception and didn't tell us.  Last time I checked, you were given sufficient notice (five weeks, but who's counting).  Don't "say" you are going to come and not show up.  Talk is cheap.  Pretending like it never happened is even worse.   Unless you were out of town, dead, or attending a funeral, you should have been there. You may have forgotten, but we haven't. 
• In the heat wave the first week of July, our central air bust and one of our huge trees collapsed on a power line.  We waited until 2 a.m. for Rocky Mountain Power to tell us that they can't help us.  Did I mention that I was getting married in a few days?  They didn't care.  Then some old man came and "fixed" our central air unit and took our money, when really he didn't fix a darn thing.  I hope you enjoy your sixty dollars.  It was a good thing it happened when it did or I would have gone Judge Judy on your behind.
• Joe and I have grown out of some of our friendships with people while reconnecting with others.  It's kind of sad to see how important a person can be one year, and the next, completely different.  I guess that's the way it works.  Insert The Lion King's "Circle of Life" song here, although no one is dying, or a lion, or Elton John.  Ok, you get my point.
• Joe's shift kept getting cut and cut.  Thank goodness for the turn of events.
• Our soaring credit card bill is enough to cause ulcers in cats.  Hopefully by our ten-year anniversary it will be paid off.  And let's not discuss my student loan.

And now looking ahead for 2014:

I'm not going to make lofty goals because I will be embarrassed come this time next year and nothing has changed (especially in the exercise department).  Speaking of exercise, if you want to set that goal, that is awesome.  I just really don't want to read about it on Facebook.  Which means, I will either have to block you, you can delete me, I can get a better attitude and deal with it, or you can write about something far more interesting.   But in the keeping it real department, I'm sure you will just continue posting the crap, I will read it, make fun of it, and move it on along. In ten years, you will look great, and I will be a sagging mess in which you can say, "Remember when you made fun of me for exercising?" 

Ok, here's the list:

• I hope to put a significant dent in paying off the credit card.
• I hope Joe continues to love his job and do well.  SHOW ME THE MONEY!
• I want to go on a trip.  Like a real one.  Wendover doesn't count even though they have the best beds.  And when we do go to Wendover, I hope I don't get food poisoning and end up in the Dell convenient store again.  Heck, maybe we can even win money this time.
• I want to have an epic birthday/anniversary/Joe's birthday celebration.  Hopefully with a bunch of strangers in a location that isn't Utah.
• I hope the crow's feet will stay at fourteen if I continue to moisturize twice a day.
• Bravo should seriously consider firing Brandy and Carlton from Beverly Hills and Kenya from Atlanta.  Vanderpump Rules is seriously a new low for Bravo, but I can't help but watch it.  Maybe if ABC would pick better Bachelors and Bachelorettes, I could watch that instead.
• I think Katy Perry and Kelly Clarkston should take a year off  (or twenty).  I find them both really annoying and I don't give a hoot about what they are wearing or where they had Sunday brunch.
• Snoop Dogg should come back in concert on a day that is not a school night and in a venue that isn't some former night club in Park City crap.  And while I think it's great that Snoop isn't doing horrible things or rapping about these horrible things, I think his concert should be his greatest hits and he should wear his house shoes just like mine.
• I hope Coca-Cola will be on sale more than it was this past year.  I'm not supposed to drink it anyway, and having it sometimes be up to $1.50 is just down right wrong.

And now that I've reached the end of the list, this is where I need to say I will be a better wife and cook dinner more than three times a week, be a nicer daughter, a more understanding friend, a patient teacher, reduce the sarcasm, stop swearing (even though I think that if you izzle it it's not swearing), and look for the silver lining in all things. 

So yeah...


Happy New Year's!